Sincerity of the Heart

by Shelley Noonan

happy valentines day - pink gerbera with a heart of chocolate!
The best way to teach sincerity or authenticity to your daughter is to model it.

You cannot teach your daughter how to be real if you are not. That would be the epitome of insincerity and totally nullify what you’re trying to accomplish. So, before you aim to teach this jewel to your daughter, be sure your own heart is right. If this is something that has been an ongoing struggle, pray for help and don’t be afraid to be honest with your daughter about your struggle. It is better to be upfront, and sincere, then to hide it. You can do this.

All Heart

Being sincere is a condition of the heart. However, at times people remain shut out from others which can create a facade. Before being sincere with others, we need to teach our girls to be real with themselves–honest. And perhaps, this will spill into honesty with you.

My 9-year old daughter had an incident with her ballet instructor last week. It was only upon doing a little digging that I found this information. My daughter didn’t freely come to me to tell me this. I could tell something was bothering her. As she conveyed it to me, my daughter was concentrating on some new dance steps and her instructor made this comment about her not smiling, “What do you think your mother would say if she saw you on stage not smiling?” It pierced her.

Allowing her the freedom to share with me without fear gave me the ability to speak into the situation. By the end of our conversation she was ready to return to her ballet class with a new motivation to keep going–knowing how her mom really felt. Had she not been sincere about her feelings, and how that comment bothered her, she would continue to dread dance class every week. Now she sees it as a new challenge to tackle and she knows her mom is proud of her, even if she forgets to smile.

The Voice of the Holy Spirit

Being honest isn’t always the easiest way to do things–but it’s certainly the most freeing. One example would be coming forward with the truth when your conscience nips at you. There a freedom that comes with being honest. We need to train our daughter’s how to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit. He is our conscience. He is what nags at us to do the right thing or confess when we have sinned. We must teach our daughters that response is in order when we acquire these feelings or nudges.

Insincere Apologies

Be careful to spot insincere apologies: apologies that come as naturally and as often as eating and drinking. These create a problem because the heart becomes calloused and careless about thoughts and actions. When consequences are left with just an apology, often the result are insincere apologies that come more and more frequently.

There is certainly a place for mercy in a truly repentant heart. Insincere apologies is not something that should be left alone. Get to the heart of the matter before it becomes a bad habit. If it’s a matter of carelessness, some consequences need to be put in place to reverse a careless heart, and so forth.

In the end…

The sincere heart is one of the most beautiful things your daughter can possess. It spills over into other areas of her life and pours into the lives of others.

Teach and guard sincerity as a fine jewel, because it is one that shines brightly on the crown of the excellent woman.

Twitter AvatarChristin is a homeschooling mother of 5 and wife to an amazing, Jesus-loving man. She writes at Joyful Mothering, encouraging moms in the discipleship of their children, and in their own spiritual lives.

You can also find her chatting it up on Twitter as @ChristinWrites.

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