Chapter 10 – Sincerity

by Shelley Noonan

Hello Girlfriends!
I wish I could express how grateful I am that you are  sticking with me through this study. What did you think of last week? As you remember, in Chapter 9, I introduced you to a friend I am positive you would like your daughter to have.  This quiet, gentle companion is called Truthfulness and crowns your daughter’s head and beautifies her countenance! She is a BFF that promises to ALWAYS protect, even when you, Mom, aren’t there. And finally, this friend promises to  set her thinking right when she is deceived. What girl wouldn’t want to have an ally like this??

This week I want to introduce your daughter to another friend, Truthfulness’ twin sister, Sincerity. Ralph Waldo Emerson once said,

“To be sincere is the highest compliment  you can pay.”

Like a fraternal twin, Sincerity is similar to truthfulness but is the expression of it in a girl’s thoughts, words and actions toward others. To call someone sincere can be considered the highest compliment you can pay… because sincerity also makes one vulnerable to others. It is real, honest, true and genuine. True sincerity is revealed by actions and motives that are not feigned, assumed, or preformed.  I am praying for you this week and how you can teach your girl about this subject!

Sincerely yours,


P.S. Can I be real (sincere and vulnerable) with you? It is such a joy for me to write these little studies for you Moms to encourage you as you read through Beautiful Girlhood and The Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood. But I have to tell you, at times I feel discouraged because I can’t gauge if this is a blessing to you or not. Would you consider just dropping me an email or commenting if this is ministering to you as you minister to your daughter?


Remember I mentioned that lies come in many different shades and hues? Lies were discussed in Chapter 9 and are some sneaky, surreptitious symptoms that erupts in your daughter’s life if she is NOT well acquainted with companions called Truthfulness and Sincerity.  Lies take a variety of different shades and hues and just like colors; some lies are easier to see than others. This week, keep your eyes open for sincerity and for the rainbow of shades lies come in!

Warning: Because lies are sometimes hard to detect, I have listed some that you might encounter.

Don’t be afraid to address them with your girl!

1. Advertising Lies– Point these out to your daughter as you listen to commercials that promise impossible benefits.

2. Bluffing– This lie is considered acceptable and is often used in card games or when bargaining with someone.

3. Bold-faced lie– This lie is bold and brazen. It is telling a lie that all can perceive is not true.

4. Exaggerating– This whopper of a lie makes an event, action, thought, pain, response, greater than it is in reality.

5. Harmful – This is a lie that is malicious and is meant to hurt or defame someone. Bully’s often use this lie to harm others.

6. Lying to avoid punishment– It is what it is. Lying to get out of trouble.

7. Omission- The lie of omission means you leave out pertinent information for the purpose of misleading.

7. Perjury- This is a legal term where one lies in court or in a sworn statement.

8. Sarcasm- Using a distorted truth or exaggeration to make your point.

9. White Lie- A lie we use to avoid hurting those we care about.


Memory Verse: 1 Peter 1:22

Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.

Ponder and Post:

  • What are some methods you use to encourage the companions of Truthfulness and Sincerity in your daughter?
  • Be brave, give others feedback on what you think about the material we covered today. Post your comments and questions!


{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

bentomom December 2, 2010 at 7:57 am

My daughter and I have been journeying through Beautiful Girlhood and are in chapter 10 right now. Yesterday I was helping her to set up a blog of her very own( and somehow came across your’s. You are of great encouragement to me as sometimes I feel like an island in my desire to mentor my precious daughter. We now plan on going through our Bible study right along with you!

Thank you,
Laura C.


Shelley December 2, 2010 at 9:29 am

Welcome Laura C.!
You are not alone in yoru desire to mentor your daughter…there are many of us! Start at what ever point you are in the book and I will respond to your comments. Even if you could get some other friends to go through it along side you and your daughter…that might help the feeling of isolation. Let me know how I can encourage you Laura…


Natalie November 18, 2010 at 10:15 pm

This is absolutely beautiful!


Shelley November 23, 2010 at 12:58 pm

Thank you Natalie!


Shelley November 18, 2010 at 2:32 pm

Awww, thanks for the feedback Jan!
Sincerity is such an important quality to cultivate in our daughters and even our own lives. Yes, God values sincerity so much and addresses it many times in scriptures. I just looked up all the verses on truth and was amazed at the number of verses there are! God wants truth in our inner parts. Thanks for brining up the point about social graces and how sincerity plays a role in this interaction. I teach a two classes on manners called Manners Matter and Manners Boot Camp and I am amazed at how many young people aren’t aware of the messages they are conveying when they are shiftily looking away or avoiding eye contact. The message most people read into this action is “I don’t want you to see who I really am…” It is difficult to trust people when they appear insincere…

Great points as usual Jan!


Jan November 16, 2010 at 6:11 pm

We have enjoyed the study greatly. I appreciate reading your thoughts here as it prepares me for what I’ll be reading to the girls later in the week. I enjoy the ponder and post questions as it gives me something to think on for myself, not just for the girls. I know that it takes a lot of time and energy to write these things and I am thankful for your willingness to serve and lead us.
Two things stick out in my mind from this week’s study:
1) The value God places on truthfulness and sincerity. Lying lips are an abomination… liars will be cast into the lake of fire… don’t make a vow if you don’t intend to keep it. God feels pretty strongly about this!
2) The contrast between sincerity in past years and now, as measured by eye contact, a handshake, and a smile. Being out in the marketplace occasionally reminds me how valuable these common courtesies are in communicating how we feel about ourselves and others. If we teach our children the importance of these things, they will definitely stand out as a light in a dark world, and will have an opportunity to share about the hope that is in them.


Maxine November 16, 2010 at 2:41 am

Shelley, my youngest is almost 18 and a tad bit beyond this study. Wish it was around about three years ago or so because it’s just wonderful. Much of what you have been covering is touched on in my Beauty Contest booklet, so it affirms what I’ve written there to some degree. I truly appreciate that. I too pair honesty and sincerity together as sisters. I find nothing more beautiful in any young lady than truthfulness and her sister.

I ‘ve missed a couple of chapters but what I have seen has been impressive. If I think of any moms with girls in this category, I’ll be sure to refer them to this place!

I also appreciate your kindred heart which I don’t run into too very often.Believe me, I know how it is when you get little feedback, but I would strongly encourage you to keep up the good work you are doing for the Lord here.


Shelley November 16, 2010 at 3:38 pm

Thank you Maxine for your kind words! It really is an encouragement for me. 🙂 I would really like to see your Beauty Contest Booklet. I am always looking for excellent resources to pass on to the girls in this study.


Maxine November 17, 2010 at 2:03 am

Will do, Shelley, but I think I’ll wait until I get the guide finished. Working on it now and need your prayers!


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