Chapter 1 ~ A Rose Opens

by Shelley Noonan

Ladies,

Welcome to the first chapter in our study! As you glance over the chapters of Beautiful Girlhood and The Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood in preparation for your time with your daughter, you will notice several themes that will be developed over the next 32 weeks. By the way, B’twixt and B’tween Blog is simply something I am giving Moms going through the Beautiful Girlhood study and The  Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood. It is not a substitution for The Companion Guide, only additional information for you Mom!

For our purposes today we are going to concentrate on the theme of your daughter’s transition from girlhood to womanhood. Warning: this is a topic that can make us moms a bit weepy!

My farmer husband has a green thumb and grows a variety of stunning plants that are both edible and ornamental. One of his prized possessions is a rose bush of his grandmothers.  Each year in early July, around his birthday, this old plant bears the most striking, peptobismolesque, pink roses.  They start as a bud and within what seems like a blink of an eye the buds open to display their full glory.

The image of a rose is used in this chapter to illustrate the tender journey your daughter is making. Metaphorically speaking, your sweet girl is in the bud stage and will eventually unfold as she matures into a full blown glorious blossom.

Girlhood is the opening flower of Womanhood.

I encourage you to slow down this week; ponder for a moment your daughter’s amazing journey – not the destination. Many a rosebud becomes blighted and never reaches their full promise.  Ask the Lord for ways to walk with and share your daughter’s passage.  As you gaze upon the metamorphosis occurring before your very eyes, be aware that you are both a gardener and a guardian against the blight of sin for these few short years.  Commit to seek the Lord on this subject of transition and enjoy these glorious days of beautiful girlhood with your daughter.

Blessings,

 

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Activity: 

  • Read Chapter One of Beautiful Girlhood  aloud with your daughter and do the questions and Bible Study Activity.
  • Observe your daughter this week and write down some of the ways you see her exhibit cheerfulness. Notice how she promotes good cheer or induces pleasantness in others. Be ready to bless her socks off with these observations when you do the chapter together!

Memory Verse:

Proverbs 15:13

“A happy heart makes the face cheerful;

heartache crushes the spirit.”

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Ponder and Post:

  • Go ahead, leave a comment below and  share with others in the group ways you have been preparing your daughter for adulthood.
  • Go to my FACEBOOK page and post a picture you have taken of you and your daughter for our group!
  • Full disclosure time, how are really feeling about your daughter’s growing up? Post it in the comment section! (Go ahead, spill! Others are most likely feeling just like you!)

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Recommended Resources:

 

Queen in a Home of Her Own Article

This is the FREEBIE of the week! How do you teach your daughter the skills she needs to know in order to be a ‘Queen in a Home of Her Own’? When do you begin? Learn the 9 basic lesson of training your daughter in the area of domestic arts.

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Mentoring Your Daughter
Little girls grow up so fast….if only there was a simple method to instill your values into your daughter. There is! It’s called mentoring. The main component to mentoring is T.I.M.E. Join Shelley Noonan as she encourages and motivates you to spend your T.I.M.E. mentoring your daughter by sharing her own brand of practical wisdom. Glean information on various ways to mentor and resources to make the time that you spend with your daughter unforgettable! $6.99

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{ 35 comments… read them below or add one }

Keri March 10, 2013 at 4:02 pm

I am so glad that I found this website some while back. We completed Beautiful Girlhood & the study guide early in the school year this year and are starting Monday, going through it again! I absolutely love this study and think that it is vital to our daughter’s learning as she is growing into godly young womanhood. I have seen so much take place in her heart just in the past year, and as she has just turned 13, the battle is getting harder and I pray that she can grab hold and hold fast to God’s truths about her as a young lady. This time we will be joining in with b’twixt and b’tween, to guide us along the study for a bit deeper look and some broader understanding. Excited that we are doing this study again!!! Thanks so much for sharing this site for us to be able to learn from and find other moms and daughters who are this journey together too :] Please be in prayer for us that I will be a good example as a mother, woman and homemaker, and that her heart will be open to allow God to make the needed changes and to grow in him and lean on him.

Always in Christ,
Keri
ahomemakersglory.com

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Shelley March 21, 2013 at 2:18 pm

Hello Keri!
So glad you found us as well! Keep me posted how your study goes this time. I am impressed that you are going through it a second time. My prayer is that God will open your eyes and her heart to all that He wants to accomplish in her life. May the Lord richly bless the time you spend reading and studying The Beautiful Girlhood book and The Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood.

Please keep me posted!
Blessings,
Shelley

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Terra August 15, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Shelley,
I met you a few years ago at a home school conference and my daughter and I have been blessed by your wisdom. We have been doing “special time” for four years now and this year she turned twelve! Just yesterday as part of our home schooling this year we began beautiful girlhood with the companion guide. I actually just stumbled onto this blog through a friend and am in awe of God’s timing! I read this post and teared up because all too often I find myself focusing on how much farther my dd has to go than rejoicing in how far she has come. Thank you for allowing our Lord Jesus to use you in such a mighty way!

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Sarah January 3, 2012 at 7:26 am

I love the deffinitons that you put up, I am using them weekly for my desk-top.

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Tina October 4, 2011 at 1:06 pm

We just started this today. As my tail end child, dd seems to have gotten the short end of my attention to this point. Now that I have one graduated, I wanted to make sure and spend time with her this year. And this looks like an excellent way to connect and get close. My mom was a great mentor (still is!) and is close to dd, too, so I don’t worry too much about her. Now reigning her in to be more of a lady instead of a wild independent thing may be a challenge! lol She is and always has been a source of joy to everyone she meets. I could learn a lot from her! 🙂

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wpadmin October 4, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Tina,
So glad to have you join us with this study! I enjoy the description of your “wild independent thing” who brings joy to all she meets. It is going to be a fun trip for you two to be on.
Blessings,
Shelley

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Gidget October 3, 2011 at 2:43 pm

Oh, wow, the discussion after we did Chapter 1 was so surprising! I learned a lot about my little lady during that talk. I could see her opening up to me and she was just having a great time talking. I just wish I could figure out how to continue that through to the rest of the day and the week….she seems to snap closed so easily 🙁

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wpadmin October 3, 2011 at 2:46 pm

Just keep talking with her…keep pursuing her…don’t give up!

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Barb S. September 14, 2011 at 9:57 pm

We had some great conversation today as we went through the Companion Guide questions after reading Chapter 1. Katie admitted she is sometimes eager for her independence. I likened the training period to learning to drive a car. If I gave her the car keys now and told her to get herself to orchestra rehearsal, how would she feel? She admitted she couldn’t do it. So that was a very practical application to help her see that “independence and maturity come later.” I admit it saddens me that she seems eager to leave home, to even move away somewhere (closer to the ocean as she feels drawn toward dolphins and marine biology; of course, there is time and that could all change). Does that independence necessarily mean they have to be so far away? I see so many extended families that are disconnected, separated by miles, not really involved in each other’s lives. How do we communicate that independence does not mean we aren’t still inter-dependent? Feeling a little melancholy at the thought of her growing up and going away.

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Lisa @thebeadgirl September 13, 2011 at 2:48 pm

We started today and the loved our time together….it WAS hard not to be weepy and sentimental! So excited for this journey!

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Christin @ Joyful Mothering September 13, 2011 at 6:44 am

I have two girls and three boys. My eldest girl is 9 and I find raising girls much more challenging than raising boys and I believe it’s because I am a girl, too! I think hormones can clash!

The reality of my daughter reaching the tween years seems surreal – like it’s not really happening. I think part of the reason is because she is still such an innocent child! Which I love! But many would consider her “immature” in some aspects {still very much a child} while she is very mature in others {in her conduct and how she handles herself, what she knows, etc}.

But because so many people are growing up faster, I feel like there are some things I need to discuss with her before someone else does or she learns in another way. It’s such a hard balance. I look forward to building a deeper relationship with my daughter through this challenge and pray it will open doors for further and later discussions. I want her to know I am a safe place to come, no matter what.
Thank you Shelley, for helping to encourage and mentor us moms through this. We need more women like you!

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Barb S. September 12, 2011 at 8:12 pm

I am a mom of three boys and one girl.

I confess to not looking forward to the tween years. I have always dealt better with boys than girls. All the emotions, “over-reacting”/drama, etc., have always been hard for me to handle. Perhaps part of that is because I never felt able to connect at a heart level with my mom. (I’m saying that for the first time here.) I pray I do not repeat this with my daughter.

It’s hard for us to get time alone, but we are working it out this school year as we drive to and from orchestra (Wed) and violin (Thrs) while leaving the younger two under the supervision of their big brother. Next year he will be off to college, so we have to take advantage of this year.

Katie has learned quite a few household skills already and is a great teaching assistant in homeschool with her younger brothers. We are excited to be starting “Training Our Daughters to be Keepers at Home” this year, which we are blogging about at trainingourdaughters.blogspot.com.

I am excited about embarking on this new stage in life, yet still somewhat apprehensive as I want our hearts to be knit together. Katie is actually already my least affectionate child. I must pray for wisdom in handling the inevitable “tween” issues that will soon be at our door. Looking forward to doing this study with you all.

Blessings,
Barb

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Aubrey September 12, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Is there somewhere that tells what the crafts and recipes are ahead of time? I want to make sure I have the supplies and ingredients to do the activities. My 10 year old daughter and I are really looking forward to the study! Thanks for all the resources.

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 6:35 pm

Hi Aubrey,
Great Question! The Crafty Girl projects come out on Tuesdays and I will have to see if I can make time to send out a this is what you need post on Mondays. The recipes are going to be linkys so I am not sure what you will need. Thanks so much for pointing this out!

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JennyMay September 12, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Hi,
i would like to join the class. I am very sad to say that I did not start this with my daughter early enough but trust in God that what I am going to start now he will bless.

I have ordered the books and other materials including the bracelets..I have two daughters 21 and 15. Liz is 21 and now married to a wonderful man who loves her and they have a great realtionship. However, God is not a part of their marriage and I hope to change that.

My darling Emily just turned 15 and probably needs this the most right now. She is very talented in sports and has a 4.5 gpa, however, she got herself into a situation with a boy over the weekend and very much compromised her purity. She did not “go all the way” but enough happened that scared her and us into admitting we have been giving her too much independance.

That being said, after a lot of tears and prayers I came across this blog, class and materials and have decided to make this my number one priority. A month ago I was hit by a car riding my bike home from work and now everything has changed. God allowed this to happen to me to wake me up a bit I think. I am probably going to drop out of my master program, work less, and focus on getting my daughters the relationship with our Lord they so desparately need. I am grateful that I have a great relationship with them already, but now I need to connect them to God in a way I was not able to do when they were younger.

Please pray that God will bless our efforts, my daughters are older and I worry for their salvation, however, I know we have a loving and faithful God who wants us all to know his son Jesus, and in that I am fully confident that my daughters will be one with my in Christ. Someday.

Kisses and Hugs,
JennyMay
http://www.The21stCenturyHousewife.com

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 6:40 pm

Hello JennyMay!
My heart goes out to you and your sweet Emily! You are a wise woman to see the hand of God in your life events and to conform to His will rather than your own. I am praying for you and your daughters JennyMay 1. The Lord will bless your efforts 2. Know Jesus intimately as Savior 3. your relationship with the girls grows4. that your friendship with Jesus deepens.

Thank you so much for sharing your heart.
Blessings,
Shelley

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Kristi September 12, 2011 at 7:40 am

First of all, thank you SO much for this study! Those of us, like myself, who were not trained as children ourselves to be lovely, gentle, feminine ladies appreciate this more than you can imagine.

We have 6 children, 3 girls and 3 boys. I’ll be going through this study with my oldest, who is 10. I’m completely at a loss as to how to prepare her for adulthood. At the moment, our plan is this study, which we’ll probably go through a few times as she grows and matures, and keep journals to watch her grow in her thoughts and answers. We’ll also be preparing her with life skills using Training Our Daughters to be Keepers at Home, which we’ll be beginning shortly, hopefully, and, when she reaches high school, we’ll be going through the Far Above Rubies curriculum. (We homeschool, by the way. If we didn’t, or if for some reason, heaven forbid, we have to stop homeschooling, all of the above would change.)

I was so lost in the world when I became an adult. It was very well known from the time I was in middle school that once I graduated and hit 18, I was to either move out on my own, or move out and go to college. Either way, I wasn’t welcome at home. (That really affected my brother and I, he moved out at 16, and I left for the Navy on my 18th birthday. We both pretty much felt kicked out.) I was no where near ready to begin adult life. I simply hadn’t had the training. I hope to avoid that heartache, embarrassment, and the struggles that come with that for my daughter, not just for the lack of life skills, but with the emotional and developmental aspects as well.

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 6:32 pm

Welcome! Congratulations Kristi….you have a plan. And that is first step. It sounds as though you felt abandoned by your family and were lost in a great big world. In a way, I think we all try to “not” do what our parents did. This can be a good and bad thing. A good thing because we can learn from their mistakes. A bad thing because this attitude can turn our hearts bitter. So happy that you are on this journey with all of us! You are doing great by making a plan and sticking to it. Ask the Lord to guide you in your role as mother and wife.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6

Hugs,
Shelley

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Rebecca September 12, 2011 at 7:33 am

Shelley and everyone,

I am so excited about this! My Mom was a single Mom…except for a few years she was remarried…I listened to most of the Mentoring Your Daughter over the weekend…and fell into pools of tears over many of it. I look forward to growing with my daughter through this…and giving God the all-so-needed time to heal my own heart…from many wounds that were created by others and were self-inflicted. I pray that through this, we will all grow closer in community a beautiful community desiring to grow up girls who are in love with their Heavenly Father!

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 6:06 pm

Oh Rebecca! I should have a warning on the CD. Too many of us can relate in one way or another the talk Mentoring Your Daughter.
When I think about the healing that God can do in your heart through Jesus, it makes me rejoice! He can certainly turn our mourning into dancing, He has mine. He can transform yours as well.

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Annie September 12, 2011 at 7:28 am

I’m with Kelly, I often can feel clueless!!! I’m a 36 year old mother of two girls, aged eleven and a half and two years. Their names are Rose (my oldest who I will be doing the study with) and MaryGrace (my sweet but mischevious two year old!!!) I look forward to this time with my oldest and getting wisdom from all of you!!! <3

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 6:00 pm

LOL Annie,
Funny true story. My daughter Laura was about 20 years old and she called me and said, “Hey, I just figured some thing out. I was your guinea pig.” I asked her why she thought she was a guinea pig. She stated, “I was the oldest in the family and you really didn’t have a clue what you were doing…did you?” At that point I had to fess up and tell her no. I didn’t always know what I was doing. But then I was given the honor of walking by faith not by sight and relying on the Lord’s guidance. Then, I told her she was a fabulous guinea pig! Hope this helps you!!

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Annie September 13, 2011 at 7:07 am

yes, it does, thank you! Rose IS indeed, the best guinea pig ever, lol!!! She came into this world with a kind heart and she is very, very forgiving. I’m blessed to have her as my oldest. =)

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Kelly July 11, 2011 at 7:04 am

Hi!
I am a mama of 4 girls! I have no idea what I am doing!!! So happy to find your website. 😀 Looking forward to reading!
Kelly

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wpadmin September 12, 2011 at 5:56 pm

Hi Kelly! You are a blessed mama. Glad you found us and feel free to read along and comment!
You have no idea what your doing? I understand that feeling all too well. Glad that I get to be an “older woman” to walk with you and cheer you on! Welcome.

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Daniel December 17, 2010 at 11:50 am

great post, thanks for sharing

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Jan Gaines September 14, 2010 at 1:25 pm

I am a mom to 5, 3 girls (12, almost 10, and 7 1/2), and 2 boys (4, 2). I will be doing the study with all three girls. We are excited to have our first tea time this morning. I pray that I will be diligent enough to continue! I know that my daughters’ blossoming is a normal part of growing up and so I am excited to begin to see the fruit of our investment of time, energy, love, and prayer. However, I am a little melancholy as I realize they will all be grown before I know it. And as older children they really see all mom & dad’s rough spots as they are more attentive to that; this requires much humility on our part!

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admin September 17, 2010 at 3:28 pm

Hello Jan,
I am wondering how your tea went with your girls? I hope it was delightful. A little melancholy is natural as you watch your daughters bloom before your very eyes. I know I experienced the same feeling as I watched my daughter, Laura’s transformation. This study will give you some very positive character development and changes to focus on!

I can attest to children seeing our “rough spots” when they are younger…but also as they grow into adults. There is a natural process they go through where they evaluate how we, as parents, raised them and how they desire to raise their own children. Humility is so important at every age and stage. SN

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Jan September 27, 2010 at 1:42 am

Our tea was delightful. My oldest daughter especially seemed to take to heart our discussion on cheerfulness and really practiced it throughout the week. This week, for Chapter 2, I was unable to have our tea time until Friday, and we enjoyed the discussion about being a capable woman. When my youngest daughter asked to get her coloring book mid-tea time, I thought I’d lost her attention. I was pleasantly surprised when she returned with her When I’m A Mommy book by Ginger Adair Fulton, a paraphrase of Proverbs 31 that we’d just been reading. She asked me to read it to her at the end of our time, so we all enjoyed looking at the adorable illustrations and really seeing the things that a virtuous woman does. Our times together have been very sweet and it has been worth juggling schedules with the little guys to have the quiet time.

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Kim September 13, 2010 at 7:46 pm

I am a mother of 2 girls, 3 boys. My 9 1/2 year old and I will be doing this together. The encouragement on your website is awesome. Prayer is most powerful in all of parenting.

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admin September 17, 2010 at 3:21 pm

I agree Kim! Prayer changes everything. SN

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Laura Fadenrecht September 13, 2010 at 7:17 pm

We are a family of 4 girls~ and I’ll be doing this with my oldest.. a 11 year old. We are members of our local Keepers of The Faith and we are hitting Character Qualities book hard!!! Just discipling her day in and day out is the hardest… but most effective thing we’ve found. She has such a willing spirit to learn~ it is precious to be around her!

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admin September 13, 2010 at 7:47 pm

Welcome Laura! I agree, the day-in-day-out discipling is oh so hard but effective. I pray that the weekly focus on specific character traits will be a blessing all who do the Beautiful Girlhood and The Companion Guide study.
SN

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Jennifer Harrington September 13, 2010 at 4:06 pm

I am a mother to 2 boys, 2 girls. My 10 year old and I will doing this together. We home school all of our children. We love keepers at home.

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admin September 13, 2010 at 4:14 pm

Welcome Jennifer! I am so glad you joined us. 🙂 I love Keepers At Home too. It is such a great way to work on the skills we want our daughters to have as keepers of the home. SN

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